Natalie said that there’s nothing wrong w/ me it’s just that the guys mature slower than us.

I think that yesterday, I didn’t give myself enough credit. i’m feeling a lot better about myself. Last night, emily convinced me to start liking Dave S. She made a deal with him. I’d like him and she’d set me up with him. We’re planning on going to fair on Mon. Here’s her plan:

Sometime during the day she pulls Dave aside, (there’s only going to be Nat. + Jordan, M + Doug + Me + Dave there) and asks him how he feels about me. She’s going to say that she has a suspicious that I like him. Then I’m supposed to give him hints, like singling him out, that I like him. Then when it gets dark, we’re all going to go on the ferris wheel — the giant one and it’ll be Nat + Jordan in one, Em + Doug in one, and since we’re the only ones left, Dave and I in one. So then when we get off the wheel, Dave and I will be going out. Yeah right! I’m willing to let M try it, but I doubt it will work.

At ice-skating today, (Natalie’s starting lessons) Natalie sat she’s going to help too. Natalie’s going to talk to Dave and ask him if he’s ready for a relationship. I really like Dave, I think and I REALLY want to go out w/ him. Well I guess I want 2 go out w/ someone. I hope their plans work. I seriously do. But I want Dave to like me a little not just ask me out because he was kinda pressured to. Last time I was this close to having a boyfriend, I kinda blew it. Robbie said no. But all I have 2 do is put that behind me. I chose my divine blueprint and I know that it’ll happen if its meant to. I just hope it works out. I’ve actually started to like Dave. And I want to go out w/ him. So, Nat + M — give it your best shot! I don’t know if it’ll work though…

BECKY IS COMING!!!

I’m so happy! They bought the plane tickets! No turning back now! I can’t wait! I miss her so much!

Natalie said that there’s nothing wrong w/ me it’s just that the guys mature slower than us. So, pretty soon the guys will come around. I still want 2 go out w/ someone before I’m 13! I’m glad me + Natalie are good friends. She’s a great one to talk to She cheers me up and isn’t afraid to tell me the truth about myself. We spent a few hours on the phone and it was very insightful! I’m glad I have such great friends that are there for me. I know M’s always there for me, but sometimes I just don’t feel like talking 2 her. I’m glad I can always ask Natalie 4 advice + help. P.S. She says she was to be a counselor when she grows up. She’ll make a great one!

I really hope that this thing with Dave works out. I’m worried about making conversation on the wheel. That thing moves so slow. I don’t know how I’m going to do it. I’ll figure something out. Maybe I’ll talk about the view. I just can’t act shy! He’s not shy — I can’t be! I’m not shy but I don’t talk much around people I don’t know. Before I know it my palms start to sweat and my voice cracks. Now, that would be a major embarressing moment! I hope I don’t smell or anything. It would be soooo soooo romantic if he liked me and asked me out on the ferris wheel. I can just see it.

He had just made a joke and we’re laughing there there’s a pause as we the study the view. I say “it really looks like they’re trying to set us up.”

He’ll say, “yeah, it does.” He pauses. “So how about it? I mean, you wanna go out?”.

I say “yeah. okay. cool.”  There only a few more feet of riding left and he makes jokes when we get off he grabs my hand 4 the rest of the night. And at the end of the night he kisses me goodnight. Ah, heaven!