We went to see the house again. It’s only a few blocks away. I wish that the money would hurry up and come so we could get it. Mom + Dad had a big fight today. Mom doesn’t want to go back to work, but it looks like she’ll have to. But, now everything’s ok between them.

Tomorrow is the first dress rehearsal. The play is on Wed. I pretty much know my lines and I’m not really nervous.

This week is my last week in summer school. I want it to end, so I can sleep in. But I don’t want it to end ’cause then I’ll have nothing to do.

For some reason, I really miss Em. I haven’t talked to her since Wednesday. I guess it’s kinda that I had alot of company 4 a week — from Beck, and now I’m all by my lonesome. I’ve tried to call Em, but she’s not home. I wanted to do somethin yesterday or today but she wasn’t home. Maybe tomorrow.

CiAO!

Becky is gone. Again. It feels like it never happened. It was really great seeing her, and I know that our friendship will never end. But I did and with seeing her, I realized how important her friendship is to me. I know I’ll see her again.

Now I’m scared. Of eight grade. I know that it’ll be the same as it always has been. But after my eighth grade year, we’re moving. And I believe it. The money will come very soon and then we’ll buy a house that’s being built. We saw it today. It’s huge. We’ll spend the school year in that house and then we’re gone for awhile, I wanted to move. I wanted to make a fresh start at a new school. I could figure out who the “happy group” people are and fall into their circle. I could do that. But I love my friends. I don’t want to leave them. This year is going to be my last year with them and I’m going to make it my best. But there are the normal worries and for some STUPID reason I’m worrying about them: What if I don’t know anyone in my classes; What if my friends ditch me + make me a loner; well you get the idea. What is 5th per. lunch like. It’s the same as 7th, I know. It’s going to be so cool, having all of my friends at the same lunch. I don’t want to drift away from any of my friends. I’m not going to worry about eighth grade right now. In about half a month, maybe!

I think I’m going to lay off the Dave thing 4 a while. I find myself thinking about him too much. A few days ago, I really scared myself by thinking that I loved him. I like him, but I don’t love him. I can’t love him. I’m going to try to stop liking him. I have to face the fact that right now a relationship isn’t in the cards for us. A friendship maybe, but not a relationship. I’m sure that when school starts I’ll meet a hella sweet, hella scrumptuous (that’s my new word — means fine) guy. And fall in love. But until then, I’m kinda giving up on Dave. I swear, it’s like I’m obsessed with him. And I don’t like that. There are some guys in summer school. None that I could ever have some interest in. But on Mon, I think I’ll take a look.

Good bye and Good Nite!

To me, there’s something comforting about writing in here before I go to bed.

Today I apologized to Em for being mad at her. I know before I did, I was being a bitch on the phone [ink color abruptly changes from pink to black]– that pen was not working! Anyway, I talked to Beck and I feel a lot better now! It seems that lately, I’ve been mad at her every other day! She’s just an easy target and I need to express my stress somehow! Sorry, M. Tomorrow, we’re going to the mall.

CIAO!

Howdy! Today at the movies it was only the four girls and Dave! I felt bad 4 Dave. Becky thought he was cute. Once again, we sat next to each other, with no one on his other side.

We talked and Dave joked quite a bit throughout the movie. The movie was great! I love it. Back to Dave, he ate almost all of my Sour Patch Kids! But I really don’t mind anything to bring us closer! I had a great time!

Goody!

Howdy! Nothing going on around here. I didn’t do anything with Em and Becky today as was planned. Tomorrow, we’re all going to the movies — the Lion King! I’m not sure who’s all going but I know it’s going to be: me, Em, Beck, Nat and Dave! I’m not going to be nervous. It’s not going to be just Dave, Jordan, Patterson or Tom W.(!) might come. It’s going to be really cool.

I got the part of Fryer Luck! But now I don’t want it! It’s really big. But, I’m glad I got it!

Hi! This is the place where I record just about everything important that happens to me. Right now, I’m in the summer vacation between 7th and 8th grade. My bestest friend, Becky M., lives in Texas. But right now she’s here in Pleasanton with me. At this moment, she’s staying with my other best friend, Emily D.

For the month of July, I’m taking an art + drama class at summer school. I’m 12, although most of my friends are 13. One of my favorite intrests is ice-skating. I’m one of the advanced classes at Dublin Iceland. I adore it. Every Wednesday, I go and skate. After school got out, one of my really good friends, Natalie D., started to take lessons. Last week, Dave S., my latest intrest, came to skating. We don’t know each other really well, but we’re friends. I’m not giving up hope, though. Smurf is his code name.

I am very creative, though I spend half my time watching the tube.

I’m in the middle of writing a book — Deja Vu. It’s a horror-love story. I’m not really far, but it’s good so far. In art class, we’re supposed to keep a book of sketches. Mine are really good, if I do say so myself. In drama, I tried out for the part of Fryer Luck (spinoff of Robin Hood) for our play. It’s a rather big part and I hope I get it! I’ll find out tomorrow.

My romance life? Non-existint. Alot of the time, I’ll put myself down but that’s only when I’m upset, of course, that’s alot of the time! I’m sort of in the “cool group”, which includes: Natalie, Emily, Jordan E. (Nat’s boyfriend), Doug B. (Em’s boyfriend), and of course, Dave. Or Smurf, if you’d rather.

My nickname is “Dipper Tinman Insane”. I got that because on my left cheek is a dipper, (as in the Little Dipper & the Big Dipper) Tinman because me, Nat, Erika H. (one of my most trusted good friends) and Christy L. (who will often be referred to as Fred–she’s another great friend) all have parts in the Wizard of Oz. I got insane because basically I’m really wierd. Crazy. Mostly hyper.

Hopefully, you know all this junk I’m telling you because you’ve read my previous diaries. In fact, I have no idea why I’m wasting all this ink and trees explaining my life. I’ll stop now and tell what happened today.

Yes, it really says that. You cannot deny that 12-year-old Jen wanted to have her diaries posted on the Internet. If the Internet had existed then, this would have been a LiveJournal.

Todays Sunday, so I didn’t have summer school (that was pointless, huh?). Anyway, I was going to go to the mall with Em, Nat and Beck. But my parental units let me have them over for swimming and dinner too.

Natalie arrived about 1:15. We walked to the mall. About 1:30 we were at Olga’s Kitchen, waiting for Em and Becky. They didn’t arrive till 1:45! Anyway I was annoyed with Em, basically all the time we were at the mall. For no particular reason, either. I just needed to take my aggression out on someone. Then, about 3:15, we got picked up by my mom. We headed home, got in our suits and went to the pool. Maybe it was the cool, wet water that snapped me into my senses. Anyway I stopped being annoyed with Em. I felt really bad, because she had read my last diary entry and was on the verge of tears. So, for the rest of the night, I tried to be especially nice. I feel bad. Sorry M!

CIAO! Bonne nuit!

Summer school’s cool. I know:

Erin C.
Lina G.
Keri F.
Jennell L.
Emily C. — 7th
Leah ? — 7th
Mike D

I’m nervous about tomorrow. Dave’s going to be at skating. I have to go to bed.

Love summer school!

CIAO!

Happy Independence Day!

I had a happy one. I got to go to Dave’s. It was really cool. Here’s how it went:

I arrived at Dave’s house about 7:10. I had forgotten the house #, and had to guess the right one. I was right. Anyway, Emily was there with Doug + Dave. She looked relieved to see me. We jumped in the pool and played Marco Polo and had chicken fights. Me + M won! Anyway. About eight we got out for some food and tossed Dave’s shirt into the pool quite a few times. Then we sat down and were in hysteria, as we ate. I ended up telling them about my parents. About 8:15, Nat arrived and we went in the spa after about 5 min. So we were talking 4 awhile. Then Nat dared Dave to tell us who he likes. He claimed he doesn’t like anyone. So then it was truth or dare time. Dave asked me next how far I’d go with a guy. I answered Natalie then I dared Doug, I think, to kiss Em. Or rather peck M. They did it. Then later on Doug who is obviously in on getting us together, dared Dave to peck me. We had to get out of the spa then and we went out in the street to wait 4 the fireworks. Then Dave pecked me on the second try the first try we kinda messed up and didn’t do it. So pecked him. Then the game didn’t continue till after the fireworks. We got back in the hot tub and continued. I was dared to jump in the cold pool and swim a few laps. Emily was going to dare me to do something like kiss Dave, but there were adults around. So I dove in and swam the laps. Adults were standing all around, and since no one was in the pool, it was embarressing. But I don’t mind. I just loved those moments when the eyes are on me. My form is pretty good, so it’s not like I was dog paddling or anything. Then I got back in the spa and soon my mom arrived. Oh wait! Didn’t I tell you? GREAT news! It doesn’t look like the parental units are going to split up. They talked about it for hours yesterday and they’ll be okay for a little while longer.

Anyway, back to the party. Quite a few times I noticed that after Dave made a joke or something, he’d look at me. I was sure to laugh at all his jokes and they’re funny too! It was really cool being with the guys. They’re so easy to talk to. It’s like being with a bunch of friends. I hope Dave considers me a little more than a friend. He’s so sweet and funny. He wants to be a comedian or an actor since lately I’ve been into acting there’s something we have in common. I was alot more open this time. I hope I was fun to be with. He’s going to be at ice-skating on Weds. So’s Emily. And of cours Nat. And hopefully Jordan.

Summer-school starts tomorrow! I really don’t want to go! I hope I know someone in my class! Anyone at all. It starts at 7:50 and ends at noon! What a waste of half the day!

Gotta go!