Get Rich Quick Scheme #432 – The Bar Laundromat

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

>> I wrote this post in April 2013 and somehow didn’t publish it. Seize the day! Today. For publishing a blog from another time… A simpler time. 

I stumbled upon some notes from 2005 the other day. Notes just 8 years old, yet they transported me to another place, another time.

I had just started this blog. I was working as a temp doing odd jobs. And I was dreaming.

A lot.

One of my dreams was to own a Bar/Laundromat. The slash was a key ingredient; when discussing the plans with friends it was always pronounced “the-bar-slash-laundromat.” Never just “bar-landromat.” The Bar-slash-Laundromat. Continue Reading

GUESS WHAT? 5/6 MEMBERS OF THE “COOL GROUP” WILL BE AT SKATING TOMORROW.

Originally Written on August 1, 1994
Posted on by Jennifer Heller

GUESS WHAT? 5/6 MEMBERS OF THE “COOL GROUP” WILL BE AT SKATING TOMORROW.

ALL EXCEPT DOUG. I CONVINCED EM TO COME. SHE’S NOT GOING TO SKATE.

I’M AT EM’S. WHEN I TALKED TO NAT. TODAY, SHE SAID THAT SHE TOLD DAVE ABOUT MY B-DAY.

SHE SAYS THAT HE MIGHT GET ME A PRESENT. I KNOW I’M DREAMING, BUT I HOPE HE GETS ME A LITTLE TEDDY BEAR THAT SAYS “I LOVE YOU”!

I love you Teddy Bear

Keep dreaming, 12-year-old Jen. It’s 18 years later, and you still have never received one of these.

NOW THAT WOULD BE A GREAT PRESENT. “GREAT” IS A VERY OVER-USED WORD! BUT, ANYTHING FROM SMURF WILL BE SPECIAL

I’M TIRED.

AU REVOIR!

BONNE NUIT!

J’ADORE SMURF!

The Diary Project

Natalie said that there’s nothing wrong w/ me it’s just that the guys mature slower than us.

Originally Written on June 22, 1994
Posted on by Jennifer Heller

I think that yesterday, I didn’t give myself enough credit. i’m feeling a lot better about myself. Last night, emily convinced me to start liking Dave S. She made a deal with him. I’d like him and she’d set me up with him. We’re planning on going to fair on Mon. Here’s her plan:

Sometime during the day she pulls Dave aside, (there’s only going to be Nat. + Jordan, M + Doug + Me + Dave there) and asks him how he feels about me. She’s going to say that she has a suspicious that I like him. Then I’m supposed to give him hints, like singling him out, that I like him. Then when it gets dark, we’re all going to go on the ferris wheel — the giant one and it’ll be Nat + Jordan in one, Em + Doug in one, and since we’re the only ones left, Dave and I in one. So then when we get off the wheel, Dave and I will be going out. Yeah right! I’m willing to let M try it, but I doubt it will work.

At ice-skating today, (Natalie’s starting lessons) Natalie sat she’s going to help too. Natalie’s going to talk to Dave and ask him if he’s ready for a relationship. I really like Dave, I think and I REALLY want to go out w/ him. Well I guess I want 2 go out w/ someone. I hope their plans work. I seriously do. But I want Dave to like me a little not just ask me out because he was kinda pressured to. Last time I was this close to having a boyfriend, I kinda blew it. Robbie said no. But all I have 2 do is put that behind me. I chose my divine blueprint and I know that it’ll happen if its meant to. I just hope it works out. I’ve actually started to like Dave. And I want to go out w/ him. So, Nat + M — give it your best shot! I don’t know if it’ll work though…

Becky is coming!!

BECKY IS COMING!!!

I’m so happy! They bought the plane tickets! No turning back now! I can’t wait! I miss her so much!

Natalie said that there’s nothing wrong w/ me it’s just that the guys mature slower than us. So, pretty soon the guys will come around. I still want 2 go out w/ someone before I’m 13! I’m glad me + Natalie are good friends. She’s a great one to talk to She cheers me up and isn’t afraid to tell me the truth about myself. We spent a few hours on the phone and it was very insightful! I’m glad I have such great friends that are there for me. I know M’s always there for me, but sometimes I just don’t feel like talking 2 her. I’m glad I can always ask Natalie 4 advice + help. P.S. She says she was to be a counselor when she grows up. She’ll make a great one!

I really hope that this thing with Dave works out. I’m worried about making conversation on the wheel. That thing moves so slow. I don’t know how I’m going to do it. I’ll figure something out. Maybe I’ll talk about the view. I just can’t act shy! He’s not shy — I can’t be! I’m not shy but I don’t talk much around people I don’t know. Before I know it my palms start to sweat and my voice cracks. Now, that would be a major embarressing moment! I hope I don’t smell or anything. It would be soooo soooo romantic if he liked me and asked me out on the ferris wheel. I can just see it.

He had just made a joke and we’re laughing there there’s a pause as we the study the view. I say “it really looks like they’re trying to set us up.”

He’ll say, “yeah, it does.” He pauses. “So how about it? I mean, you wanna go out?”.

I say “yeah. okay. cool.”  There only a few more feet of riding left and he makes jokes when we get off he grabs my hand 4 the rest of the night. And at the end of the night he kisses me goodnight. Ah, heaven!

School’s cool. I get to see all my friends and I get to socialize. I don’t even mind the tests.

Originally Written on June 12, 1994
Posted on by Jennifer Heller

As you can see, I’ve trid to write before. But I’ve just been too busy. There has been a lot going on. So, I’ll start at the beginning of the mad rush of stuff. Last Friday night – the 3rd was Nikki N’s party. I wasn’t sure if I was going to go to it because she’s a rocker and I’m not. But I went and I danced with her brother, he’s in 6th grade – named Ricky 4 times. I danced 3 slow and 1 fast as well as 2 slow with other peoples.

I was really uncomfortable for most of the party. Melissa L. kept telling me to ask Ricky out. Now Ricky is sweet but he’s ugly and annoying. I didn’t want to go out with him. But I survived that evening.

On Saturday I signed up for the future stars competition which is taking place tomorrow! I’m soooooo nervous!

Nothing happened on Sunday, I think. I was afraid Ricky would ask me out on Mon but he didn’t.

Nothing happened Tues but Wed. was the band concert! We played Canto and I had to play the gong! I only missed two gongs! I’m so happy and proud of myself. After the concert, Jordan talked to me, and it was like I had been accepted into their little circle. Not completely but on Thurs Jordan bopped me on the head with his rolled up poster. I can see why Emily likes him but I could never.

I’m afraid I am starting to like Andy (AGAIN!) I don’t know. It was like Wed. or Thurs. and he was coming up to our row in Science. He sit next to Lina. Anyway our eyes met and it was really wierd. In that second I got this feeling that I like him. I haven’t been able to shake that feeling, try as I might. Fri night I went camping so I had to miss my skating lessons on Sat. But I sat, starring at the starry sky, trying to short my thoughts and feelings. I haven’t figured out my feelings yet. I know it’s stupid to like a guy in the happy group because I don’t have a chance with them.

On Fri, Nikki in PE told me that Rikky wanted to go out w/ me. In French, I told Nikki that I wouldn’t. I know I made the right decision because I don’t like him, but this was a chance for me to finally have a boyfriend. I know that guys can like me, because he asked me out.

At the awards ceremony for Band, Fri. afternoon, Andy won for best lashes and he got a tube of mascara. And he does have the best lashes. They’re long and thick and gorgeous! They belong on a girl. But I can’t like him! I’m tired of liking guys I don’t have a chance with. But he is single. I could ask him out but that would be stupid. I just need to sort out my feelings for him. He’s nice though. Annoying but nice. He’s always singing, and, oh, his lashes are wonderful! But I already talked about those.

I’m soooooooo infinity os nervous! I can’t believe the competition is tomorrow! I want to win soooo bad! But I’m up against this one girl that I saw at the rink today. She’s in my class, and she’s halla good. All I can hope is that I’m not giving myself enough credit or that she falls flat on her butt. I’m also up against this sucky girl, so I can at least beat her. I hope! Please, God, help me! I want to win sooooooo bad! And I will. I choose my divine blueprint.

I really don’t want school to end. When school ends then I’m stuck alone in summer. School’s cool. I get to see all my friends and I get to socialize. I don’t even mind the tests. I wish it didn’t have to end. It’s amazing that it has been almost a year since Becky has moved. The end of the year brings back so many memories of her. I wish she hadn’t moved.

So far there is only one cuss word in it and hell’s a place not a thing.

Originally Written on June 1, 1994
Posted on by Jennifer Heller

I’ve been busy. I can’t seem to stop writing this book- I think I’ll actually do it this time. I’m going to get it published and everything. I can’t figure out what the title should be though. Today I gave lots of people copies of it so they could edit it. I haven’t made any of the changes yet- but it’s like they’re adopting my story. I might as well say it’s by Jennifer Hellers friends. I know i really need their input and believe I apreciate- but I’m not going to change a lot. I’ll think about what they think and if they think one part sucks I’ll improve it. But I’m not adding anything that isn’t my own words. So far there is only one cuss word in it and hell’s a place not a thing.

Ciao! (Chow!)

I keep hoping that some new guy will come tomorrow and I’ll immediately love him and he’ll immediately love me- time won’t exist only our love will exist.

Originally Written on May 23, 1994
Posted on by Jennifer Heller

Whenever I start a new diary (even though it’s only my 3rd one) I feel as though time passes too quickly. Well I feel that way now.

Everyone at school is making a big deal about how there’s only 17 ½ days of school left. I don’t want school to end. When it ends it means another year has passed. Summer comes and I never see anyone anymore. I’m hoping this summer will be different. Christy lives close (L.) so I am hoping I will be seeing a lot of her. Becky and I only had one real summer together- the summer between the 5th and 6th grade. Becky and I were inseperable.

I wish my friends lived closer. I have a feeling the public buses are going to get a lot of use this summer! Soon we’ll be getting our yearbooks and then the memories of last year will come rushing back like the cascade of a giant waterfall.

Seriously, the acronym for my middle school was “P.M.S.”

I’ve had two pretty good years at PMS. I dont want this school year to end partly because at the beginning of the school year I promised myself I’d go out with someone by the end of the year. Sure, everyone says they’ll set me up w/ someone but it never happens and I don’t want to be set up with someone. I want him to ask me out, not someone saying, “oh, by the way you’re going out with so and so.”

Although I would not mind that maybe even like that part of me doesn’t want it to happen that way while another part screams, “Go for it!” “Let them set you up!” I wish I could find someone to like. Anyone-I keep hoping that some new guy will come tomorrow and I’ll immediately love him and he’ll immediately love me- time won’t exist only our love will exist. We’ll spend all summer together-no barriers are strong enough to keep us apart. Well I am dreaming but I think thats the only way it’ll happen. Oh well life goes on. I think I’ll just keep daydreaming…

Our two hearts are entwined in love (now I guess we’re older) Nothing can stop us now. Except the move. The parental units are making us move to Switzerland. I beg, I plea- they’re mind is made up! It seems to be our destiny to live a long distance love. No more nightly walks or goodnight kisses. Deep into Misery The moving van takes off with our car right behind it. There I sit until I realize that there is no way I can leave him behind. I jump out of the speeding car (I’ve always wanted to do that) and run into his arms-safe, protected.

(I want to be a writer) Continue Reading

We got an office!!!

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

I’ve dared to day dream of an office lately.

After 2 1/2 years plus of working out of my living room and running Artsy Geek via Skype and coffee shop meetings, I felt life was passing me by.

It wasn’t that I didn’t get out…I did.  But not as much as I wanted to.

It’s funny the strange packages answers to dreams come in.  I met with a potential client last week.  We instantly hit it off and she was telling me about how she needed to get an office space immediately.  I asked her what she was looking for in the office space.  When her words echoed my needs exactly, I ventured to mention my interest.

Not two days later she had found us an affordable office space with room to entertain clients and interns housed in one of the coolest art gallery / warehouse spaces I had ever visited on my Oakland Art Murmur wanderings.

Yesterday we sealed the deal. Warehouse 416 is the new home to both Artsy Geek and Sarahbek Images.

Should there be an earthquake, the landlord insists that we are safe despite the gorgeous brick exterior.
An office with a balcony?? OK!
Someday soon I’ll have a desk area around here.
Sarah is chilling in our client area soon to be filled with tea and cookies.
Outside our new home!
No shortage of inspiration working amongst this awesomeness!

The whole walk back to my home office, my head sang, “Let’s put a new coat of paint on this lonesome old office…”

New York Midnight’s Flash Fiction Micro Contest

Posted on by Jennifer Heller

Once in a while I daydream of a life where I’m a full-time writer.  It’s when I’m not daydreaming of being a sculptor or a talk show host.

New York Midnight’s Flash Fiction Micro Contest found me in one of those moments, and without blinking an eyelash signed right up.

Contestants were asked to submit three 100 character stories today.  Each entry had to feature a particular word, and we received that word at roughly 9am (my time) this morning.  Entries were due at twelve hours later at 11:59 EST.

After I signed up I started thinking about it…100 characters.  That’s less than a tweet!  By 40 characters!!  They obviously picked the length so that people could tweet their stories…smart.

Today faced with my word (“stand”) and a jam-packed day I got to thinking about the task at hand.  What is a story?  How can you fit a story in 100 characters?

Luckily I’d already discussed it with my best friend G. who’s an editor by trade and a voracious reader.  She assured me that it was possible to write a story in a sentence, and that the best ones she had read were less-action packed and insinuated a larger and often obscure background story.  I got that last tip too late to really incorporate it into my stories.

I didn’t have much time, but got to work.  Continue Reading